Marriage, Supporting a Grieving Dad & Faith After Infant Loss | Episode 169 with Adam & Amanda Wilcock


Episode 169

This week on the podcast I am honored to be talking with Adam & Amanda Wilcock about their parenting journey and specifically what it has been like for them to navigate marriage after losing their son Sam.

Listen in to hear us talk about the challenges they faced within their marriage after losing Sam, how they navigated those challenges, how they grieved differently and navigated those differences in order to stay connected.

Amanda shares some thoughts on why connection is really important, not only to her husband, but to God and community. Adam shares some specific difficulties he faced in being a grieving dad and wisdom and encouragement he would give to a grieving dad listening, as well as ways to support a grieving dad. Amanda also gives wisdom about what it looks like to support a grieving spouse or partner and I thought her advice was super, super insightful.

Adam and Amanda also share very candidly and honestly abou their faith journey after losing their son and what it looked like to question God’s goodness and character and how to love a grieving mom who may be wrestling through her faith after loss.

We finish up our time together talking about what it has looked like to find purpose in their pain and loss – and I love how Amanda ends our time together by saying “even in the hardest, rawest, most painful moments, I would not give up being his mom.”

This conversation will remind you that you are not alone while also giving you hope that one day it won’t feel this heavy or this dark – there is joy to be had and a stronger marriage at the end of tragedy is possible.


QUESTIONS we discuss IN EPISODE 169

  1. What do you think is the most challenging aspect of navigating the marriage relationship after loss and what advice would you give a grieving couple about how to navigate those challenges?

  2. How did you grieve differently and how have you navigated those differences?

  3. You mentioned to me that connection is essential to surviving loss and healing, connecting with God, with your spouse, with your support system – tell me more about that.

  4. Adam, what common lies do you think men believe about grieving a baby? What would you say to them? How can a spouse or friend/family help combat those lies?

  5. Amanda, what would you tell other moms about how to care for your husband/partner in their grief?

  6. Adam, what would you tell other grieving dads about grief & how to navigate it? What would you tell them about grieving within a marriage and supporting their wife/partner in their grief?

  7. What did your faith journey look like in this season? You mentioned to me that you had to re-figure out what a good and loving God meant – tell me more about that.

  8. How do you honor Sam today? What does it look like to parent together a child in heaven?

  9. How have you found purpose in your suffering? What would you say to a mom who is having a difficult time finding purpose in this season?


MEET Adam & Amanda

Hello! We are the Wilcocks. In January 2018, after over 3 years of waiting for him, we were full term and due to welcome our miracle baby, Sam, into the world. When Sam was born it became obvious that our time with him would not be what we had expected and dreamed of. After a day of tears, love, and many miracles, we took Sam off of life support and let him go back home to our Heavenly Father to take care of him until we can see him again.

Through our experience of losing our son we are continually carried by our love of each other and Sam, our family, and our faith. We have seen SO. MANY. MIRACLES. And we have felt a deep need to help carry other families who are experiencing the loss of an infant.

Simply A Miracle exists to help others experience and see the miracles, even as they experience heartache and loss. We hope you will join us on this journey and be a part of a miracle!

connect

Website: www.simplyamiracle.com


THIS EPISODE IS DEDICATED TO LILAH VIOLET WASIELEWSKI BY HER PARENTS & FAMILY. 


We have chosen to dedicate this episode in memory of our beloved daughter, sister, granddaughter and niece Lilah Violet for her second Heavenly Birthday. The Morning has been the single most supportive resource for our family in the loss of our daughter. I hope this resource will be available for many years to come to help support other families who find themselves walking this path. Lilah, we are forever loving and forever missing you sweet girl. We're wishing you the Happiest of Heavenly Birthdays sweet girl.

Lilah Violet Wasielewski, stillborn at 29 weeks, June 19, 2020.


A special thank you to the Waielewski family for sponsoring this episode.

We celebrate Lilah and we remember her with you.


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A Real Grieving Couple's Thoughts on Marriage & Supporting a Grieving Dad after Pregnancy or Infant Loss